Biblical Habits

Transcript

i've been i've been looking forward to x to talking to you tonight um because i x have a topic that i particularly enjoy x um and i i found it to be x kind of helpful and uh x enjoyable to to go through so i hope x you'll find it the same x it's a little bit different x i want to talk tonight about biblical x habits x as uncle steve mentioned x and my interest in this topic it came x from reading a self-improvement book on x on habits x and my goal with the book you know is x simply to try and learn how to change my x behavior for the better right x um and i had all the the standard goals x in mind when i originally picked it up x in early 2020 x uh it was you know things like exercise x and getting enough sleep and eating x better and all of those x and then there were also the the x spiritual goals that made me pretty x interested in it um like specific x behaviors that i wanted to incorporate x more of x into my daily life x and things i think that we all want more x of um x you know x to pray more to to do our readings x consistently x uh listen to more spiritual music x that sort of thing x and uh there's other types of behaviors x i think that benefit from this topic um x that are less about routine that are x still great things for us to kind of x focus on doing consistently um x maybe your goal is to reach out to more x occlusal members in isolation or x trying to praise god more throughout x your day x or maybe there's x kind of character changes that you want x to achieve x and make more consistent for yourself x things like being slow to anger x you know changing our reactions to be x curious and empathetic instead of like x frustrated x um x you know i'd say all these are examples x of habits or consistent behavior x uh that we might want to try and adopt x more of and so tonight yeah we're going x to do something a little bit different x i'm going to do a bit of a book review x actually uh of this this book that i x read x um and then as we'll go through some of x the advice i love when i read these x types of books um i think it's x fascinating to to connect it back to the x bible x and i think it's fun because um x you can see that the books that really x are worth their salt you'll find that x the the best advice is already in the x bible for you so i think that's really x neat and i think there's a lot of x practical stuff that i was able to take x from this and then along the way we'll x be able to connect it to uh the bible x and some some bible characters x um so i think this is the name of the x book again josh x yeah so so the book that we're going to x be going over tonight it's called better x than before x and uh i think it's backwards on the x video but um x it's better than before and it's by an x author who who i like reading uh named x gretchen rubin x and the subtitle is x what i learned about making and breaking x habits to sleep more x quit sugar procrastinate less and x generally build a happier life x um x and so i will start off by saying i x really did enjoy reading this book um i x enjoy her as an author as well she x writes on the type of x life improvement theme and that sort of x thing it's very accessible to read so i x would recommend it x um x and uh x i found yeah i was just able to to x connect a lot of things over to to my x spiritual life and and uh walk with god x even though it's not a x religious book per se x um so right off the bat just just to x introduce it like her her goal in the x book x her interest was was sparked in habits x as part of a larger theme of how do x people change x she was fascinated by questions such as x why do some habits start like overnight x like that and others you know never seem x to get off the ground x or why can it be easy to like form a bad x habit or something that we maybe don't x even enjoy but it can be hard to do x something that we do enjoy or that's x like good for us x and another thing that she kind of asks x that i'm paraphrasing is essentially why x is our spirit so willing to do something x but our flesh feels so weak and x unchangeable x um so her whole goal with this was to x understand like what's going on under x the surface and how to help x make good changes for ourselves and i x think i mean that's our x constant goal as well x and so we we can right away see the x appeal of this topic um so much of what x we do is you know try to change x ourselves and better emulate x the ideals of christ x um and i this just before we even get x into the book itself this made me think x of romans 6 uh x starting at verse 17 x you know this is our our our daily goal x it's but thanks be to god that you who x are once slaves of sin have become x obedient from the heart to the teaching x to which you were committed x and having been set free from sin have x become slaves of righteousness x i'm speaking in human terms because of x your natural limitations but just as you x once presented your members as slaves to x impurity into lawlessness leading to x more lawlessness x so now present your members as slaves to x righteousness leading to sanctification x and so that's i i enjoy looking at x tools like this like are almost like x practical how-to guides on how do we um x become slaves to righteousness and how x do we better like like kick out these x you know bad or frustrating habits and x incorporate better things x um x and it's i think it's worthy to note the x concepts that we're about to go over x they work in two directions x they help you to do good behaviors and x you can also try and change negative x ones x [Music] x um so diving right in x the first section of the book is x entirely devoted to something that um x she says is the basis for for x making any habit for yourself and she x says that is you must understand x yourself x and you have to figure out how to do x what works for you x so she makes the point that building x good habits each one of us is very x different x and something that works for someone or x one of you is not necessarily going to x work for the rest of us x and x the message she wants to send is that's x totally okay x and it's honestly fascinating like how x much we put undue pressure on ourselves x i think x you might say like x if only i could wake up early and do x this like i wish i was able to do that x um i'm just not a morning person x um x and we can kind of like kick ourselves x because it's like uh if only we had more x discipline we could do this um and she x says well no like just because something x seems admirable per se or correct it x doesn't necessarily make it so x um x this leads to x to her guidance that we should like take x the time to really understand ourselves x so we can play to our strengths and x leverage our tendencies better which i x think is super smart x and so here's some of the things that x she says that think about for ourselves x that we can kind of like get a better x sense of what will work for us x the first thing is um x exactly what we just said are you a lark x or an owl x are you a morning person x or a night person x um x and some of us you know x this isn't just like a x like a cliche like it's an actual thing x i mean some of us are just more x effective in the mornings and some are x better at night and so we should keep x that in mind when we're trying to x designate a time to do something for x example like the readings x if you are absolutely miserable in the x morning and your brain is just not x functioning in the first several hours x of the day x you know don't think that the best plan x is to force yourself to wake up just x because it seems noble x um x you're not going to get very much out of x that x and i think x what x to speak to this um x this type of issue x specifically uh x we'll go through our first bible x character connection i think abraham has x always been a really cool example of x someone who who rose early in the x morning x i'd say pretty distinctly he had a habit x of rising early and being very proactive x when he had work to do x um and we see it a few different times x uh genesis 19 and verse 27 x it says and abraham went early in the x morning to the place where he had stood x before the lord x genesis 21 14 it says x so abraham rose early in the morning and x took bread and a skin of water and gave x it to hagar x genesis 22-3 so abraham rose early in x the morning and saddled his donkey and x took two of his young men with him and x his son isaac and he cut the wood for x the burnt offering x and that one in particular at the end x there that really stands out to me x because x we really see the x how proactive he was in doing even the x most difficult heart-wrenching tasks x he he got up early and did it x and now i just want to say i i don't x think x that the lesson here is that morning x people are holier than night owls i i x wouldn't take that away from this x um but i think there's definitely a x lesson in uh you know having that x discipline not wasting any time being x very diligent x um but definitely identify you know x which works better for you x um x and the next area of self-knowledge that x she focuses on x is are you a marathoner a sprinter or a x procrastinator x and so this refers to the pace of how x you like to do things x [Music] x so a marathoner x as she puts it is x you prefer consistent slower steady x paces x and you're not a fan of deadlines really x so you're trying to avoid that stress at x all costs and you spread spread things x out x um x compare that to the sprinter which x prefers very short bursts of of action x at a time x and are very compelled to act by by a x looming deadline x and then the difference between a x sprinter and a procrastinator is x procrastinators x uh fall into tons of stress because they x also were right before the deadline um x but sprinters chose to be there and they x were more intentional and planned and x procrastinators are kind of a victim of x of uh things falling through the cracks x uh and her advice is um if you do find x yourself in the procrastinator category x um just give yourself a break and try x and be more intentional and calculated x uh to save you from from the stress and x the blame that you might put on yourself x um x but either way if you are someone who x really likes to work on something like x far in advance x um or if you're someone who x likes needs a little bit more pressure x both are totally reasonable um just you x know figure out which one's better for x you x um and i couldn't think of a lot of x bible verses about this this difference x specifically um but there's definitely a x theme of being diligent in our work x that i think stands out x um and we certainly you know we want to x be keeping our commitments and doing x what we can however is best to our x strengths um x to kind of stay on top of things and to x work heartily and such x and so my conclusion just from from this x section is um know your know your x tendency x uh try and leverage it you know when x thinking about a collegial projects x daily tasks personal changes x um x figure out the best path x and then the third part of like the x self-reflection bit in the book that i x want to focus on um x which i think is uh pretty interesting x is she talks about being x promotion focused x or prevention focused x and she says people are motivated by x different things so for example x you could say i'd want to get more sleep x or you could say i want to stop staying x up too late x you know you could say i want to pray x more often x or i want to stop forgetting to pray x be a better listener or stop jumping to x conclusions x whatever the case may be like both are x actually the same thing they're just x presented slightly differently for you x and so what her advice is x is to frame things in a way in your mind x that you respond to better x um are you more goal oriented like do x this or do you respond better to kind of x a sense of duty almost you know stop x doing this x um and this was interesting to think x about in the context of of the bible x because we see both types of instruction x all throughout x um the ten commandments are mostly x commands to stop doing things um you x know thou shalt not x x um but not exclusively x uh and then x additionally it seems like throughout x the bible which is which is kind of neat x uh there is this flow from x responsibility with the law x to in the new testament with letters in x christ teachings um much more of like a x goal and stated ideals that we want to x shoot for x um x you know throughout the the new x testament we have like like traits that x are desirable that we should adopt and x there's certainly a mix of both like you x know don't do this and do this things x but x i think the takeaway here x is to x definitely consider both types of x instruction for yourself but also like x figure out maybe which x encourages you better x certainly be aware of of which x which that you respond to for your x mental framing x i think it can be a little problematic x to only focus on an obligation style x which is like you know don't do this x this and this x um x but at the same time some clear x guidelines for behavior like that you x know i'm not going to do this um x can help to balance out our our goals x that we hold in our head x um x so x just uh well i just want to pause for a x second um that's that's kind of the bit x on like self-reflection and kind of like x bringing our own style to uh to changing x our behavior um i'm really i'd love for x tonight to be a bit of a back and forth x and i'm sure people have have some tips x and also x can draw back to verses or bible x characters and i can't even begin to x scratch the surface of bible characters x with habits so now that we've talked x about kind of the knowing ourselves bit x uh and playing to our strengths i want x to look at some of what she calls the x pillars x of building habits and actually changing x our behavior in a direction that we want x um i think there's some really cool x stuff in here uh so the first pillar x that that gretchen advocates for x is monitoring your behavior and being x self-aware of your behavior both before x and after you decide to make the change x and incorporate something x so for example x if we're talking about doing the x readings x and your goal is to do them every day of x the week x you might want to keep track of how many x days a week you're actually you've x actually been doing them and you're x actually getting them done and this will x allow you to both see where you're at in x terms of your goal and it can also say x like help you to see okay x i never get my readings done on tuesdays x so why x and then that will help you catch what x is preventing you from actually x establishing your habit x and it's a very simple thing but i think x it can be often overlooked um x you know if you're working on a goal x such as praying or studying or something x else something you know just pretty x simple and tangible x keep track of your patterns you know x notice how you're doing x jot it down do do what works for you x this self-awareness is really huge to x being able to make the changes that you x want x and then tied in with this is she says x it's very important here to be specific x with your goals if you can be x so if your goal is just to read the x bible more i'm going to kind of keep x leaning on on that but again apply this x to whatever you'd like to to add into x your life x if your goals read the bible more x or care more about people in myoclesia x kind of vague x change that to something tangible and a x little bit more measurable so you can x actually monitor it and like see how x you're doing x so maybe change it to do my readings x every day of the week x or x on sunday morning ask two people how x they're doing and and you know check in x with them like set like almost x a goal for yourself and that doesn't x have to limit you um but it helps give x you a sense of kind of where you're at x and where you want to be it helps us x monitor ourselves x um x and to look to the bible on this uh x pulling principles from from slightly x different uh contexts the idea of x self-awareness and self-reflection is uh x is really huge to our faith walk and x in our ability to control our own x behavior x um x this one this one was neat it's this i'm x going to read from galatians 6 x starting at verse 3. x it says for if anyone thinks he is x something when he is nothing he deceives x himself x but let each one test his own work and x then his reason to boast will be in x himself alone and not in his neighbor x for each will have to bear his own load x so in this verse we have this idea of um x being honest with yourself and your x behavior x um and it can be really hard to be x objective and discerning of yourself and x that's also something that we see in the x bible right there's this idea of having x the log in your own eye x but the speck in your brother's eye x and so this is where if we bring in some x self-monitoring and like kind of keeping x track x uh and reflecting x it can help us to actually see ourselves x more clearly and actually more x objectively see where our actions stand x um because it's no longer you know i x feel like i'm pretty good at this or i x don't think i'm very good but i really x don't actually know x if we're able to pay closer attention x it'll help us to really identify like x properly how we can improve x um x another verse that x i thought was relevant is first timothy x 4 x and verse 16 x and that says x keep a close watch on yourself and on x the teaching x persist in this for by doing so x you will save both yourself and your x hearers x and so this verse is in the context of x service in the ecclesia and again x there's this theme watching ourselves x and and not being blind to our actions x our character x which is important x and then uh the last one i'd like to x focus on here is x romans 12 and verse three x and that says for by the grace given to x me i say to everyone among you not to x think of himself more highly than he x ought to think but to think with sober x judgment x each according to the measure of faith x that god has assigned x now obviously like context this isn't x specifically talking about like uh x you know exercising 30 minutes a day x every week this is more a character x reflection x but but again we have this idea here x which i think can be applied of of sober x judgment x and and true x objective x self-honesty x because this verse talks about you know x don't just like inflate yourself you x know higher than you ought to think like x be be humble and be real with yourself x and i would also say this works the x other way don't x overly um x throw guilt and shame on yourself when x maybe it's not actually totally x warranted x in the sense that uh that can really be x discouraging x so if there's something you're really x trying to work on in your life be it a x character trait or x um x you know a consistent habit of prayer x the the monitoring can really help us to x again properly self-reflect x uh which which is a really x good part of of changing our behavior x so that's monitoring and then the next x thing x that um x the author x talks about in this book x is she pushes for the strategy of x scheduling x so simply put x setting a specific regular time for an x activity x um put it on the calendar you know make x time x for the thing that you want to do x and so you might say okay like you could x be skeptical and say all right this x one's kind of obvious uh it you know x great uh you'll have a reminder to do x the thing that you want to do x um x yes x but i would i would argue that it it x actually goes a little further than this x by designating a specific time for your x habit or behavior x you are confronting the natural limits x of the day x and what i mean by that is it can be so x easy to say x i'll do the readings at some point today x or tomorrow x or i'll give brother and sister so and x so a call at some point today x but like when are you gonna do that x um because the problem is many of us are x quite busy x or just distracted for our entire day x like is there really a moment in your x day where you're sitting there so bored x with nothing to do that you then think x what would be productive for me to do x i actually bet not we're really good as x particularly these days at filling our x time x there's no shortage of things that can x can fill our day x and another default with this x is it's easy to vaguely say something x like x i'll do the readings in the evening x after i'm done with everything else for x the day x you say okay well that's a time frame x it's definitely a step in the right x direction but even with that you got to x be careful because x that's also when you do the dishes that x you've been putting off and you talk to x your family who's all just come home for x the day x and you give your brain a rest and you x unwind because you're tired x which is important and honestly x unavoidable x and so the point that i'm trying to make x here with all of this is uh that it's x really helpful to be specific and x intentional with some of these habits x and this is the same point that um x gretchen makes in the book x um it can help us reckon with the fact x that we only have like so much time in x the day to work with x and um this can be done x however works best for you do you have a x calendar or planner that you use great x uh set reminders on your phone that'll x ping you when you think is best to do it x awesome x um designating that you're gonna do it x after breakfast and before running x errands for the day sure like whatever x you think will will help you to x really fit it into your schedule so it x won't just be eaten by something else x that you have to do x that's kind of a simple thing but really x make the time there x and this one has me excited because x there's an awesome biblical example x that demonstrates scheduling that we can x point to x uh and if if i had like started off by x saying think of a bible character who x who had a very clearly defined like x habit and routine x i guess your mind would go to daniel x that's that's where my mind went anyway x um x and this is this is a cool one so x i'll just read daniel 6 and verse 10. x and the context for this here is that x the decree has just been made in babylon x that you can't pray to anyone except x king darius for 30 days x and so daniel 6 and verse 10 it says x when daniel knew that the document had x been signed he went to his house where x he had windows in his upper chamber open x toward jerusalem x and he got down on his knees three times x a day and prayed and gave thanks before x his god x as he had done previously x so this is a really cool thing x to read because we have some insight x into daniel's daily routine x in his actions which we don't always get x with bible characters x we don't actually know what some of the x more like mundane moments or like x standard things really looked like x um but here it tells us like plainly x that daniel was he was so clearly x intentional and scheduled with his x prayer that he seemed to have this x definitive routine that he stuck to x and so this may have been a morning noon x and night prayer schedule or some other x combination that worked for him and like x fit into his responsibilities you know x is his rulership x job x and x what's cool about that is x because daniel had designated this time x and he had scheduled it in and it was it x likely had become very automatic for him x and what gretchen pushes in this book x is that this is actually the goal is x your goal is to take as much energy and x willpower out of the equation x of the thing that you want to do x because daniel he had already chosen x long ago that this is when he's going to x pray he didn't have to actually spend x the energy to choose that he just went x and did it x and so that if if we can create that x dynamic for ourselves where it's just a x part of our day it's just something we x do and we'll do it i think that's an x awesome thing to fall into and that's x how things become automatic x and x daniel really x held that um in high regard for himself x so much so that even when he's facing x uh death he's not going to break from x his habit and his routine x and uh x this made me think okay x daniel he's great he's got his schedule x in his routine awesome x uh however x this isn't always easy or even possible x to do x uh some of us we may find ourselves with x schedules that are completely all over x the place like it seems like one day x does not resemble the last and things x vary week to week x and if this describes you or or ever has x it certainly has for me in college x you'll know that it's difficult to x actually make anything stick x people will say it's hard to eat healthy x or exercise or do readings or hold any x habit when you're traveling x because your routine is out the window x like all these all your kind of normal x cues are gone x and um x your routine's just broken x and we also have an awesome example of x someone who stayed consistent in these x circumstances in the bible which i think x is super neat and that is our lord jesus x um i think x it's a bit of an understatement to say x that christ's schedule varied throughout x his ministry x uh i think he had the exact opposite of x a routine he had one of the most dynamic x and changing um three years of of most x people always on the road always doing x different things being confronted with x different people on no sort of x consistent schedule i would bet that's x really what it looked like x however he still consistently prayed x and i mean of course like jesus was x consistent in prayer but it's still x worth mentioning it's it's very notable x and very um clearly marked in scripture x just how often he's able to go off and x pray even with his like x just so much like kind of going on x around him that he's involved in x uh and as soon as i started noticing x these i couldn't stop because it really x is all throughout the gospels x uh mark 1 35 says x in the early morning while it was still x dark jesus got up left the house and x went away to a secluded place x and he was praying there x mark 6 46 x after bidding them farewell he left for x the mountain to pray x luke 5 16 but jesus himself would often x there's the habit slip away to the x wilderness and pray x luke 6 12 it was at this time that he x went off to the mountain to pray and he x spent the whole night in prayer to god x and that was just four verses four x instances of this x barely scratches the surface x and so x his his prayers were not necessarily x based on x on x time per se for him i can't really speak x to how we can emulate this under you x know under such crazy circumstances x other than x uh it had to have become x um an instinct it had to become just so x ingrained that this is something that he x needed x that he's he's weary he's worn out he x needs to go and deliberate with god and x and um x you know make his appeal and x and show praise and and recharge x so i really think that is of course x christ is always going to be the highest x ideal that we can we can have in the x bible x uh x and we can x if we're if we're intentional um and x really build it into our lives and start x having prayer as just as as needed as as x eating and drinking x we can also have this kind of instinct x for x we just something doesn't feel right x unless i go and pray right now x so i think that was a pretty special x thing x and then um x we're we're nearing the end here x but the the final pillar of habits that x i want to draw out and i should say uh x we're i'm just picking out little pieces x from this book uh there's there's much x more in here x um but the final pillar that i want to x look at that i think is super relevant x to us x is accountability x and right off the bat as soon as i say x accountability i mean i think you can x see the biblical connection but she x actually has a lot of interesting things x to say x so let's dive into it x so she presents accountability x as the other half of the scheduling bit x you know this is how we make sure that x we actually follow through with what's x on the calendar x because that's the thing just like x having having the time it doesn't always x mean that we're immediately going to do x it and so that's where this comes in x so she says i mean rightly we behave x differently when someone is watching x deadlines keep us working x late fees make us pay the bills on time x a sea of turned heads make us try to x avoid walking meeting late x been there this is actually x um this is one of the appeals of things x like personal trainers or other coaches x or such in any form x what you're paying for really is x accountability x which can be really helpful and x motivating x uh another way that people find x accountability for something that they x want to do is they'll say it publicly x if i declare to you right now that my x goal is to do 500 push-ups every day for x the next year uh your first question x next time would be um how is that x ridiculous goal going x you know and i just have to hang my head x in shame because it's not going to x happen x um x and so so there's that route um and you x may have even seen that i feel like uh x that's something people do during x excitations sometimes um which i think x is kind of a neat neat concept holding x each other accountable to our uh to your x holoclesia x um x and then the x other form of this that i want to focus x on is the idea of x you you have something that you want to x incorporate in your life you have x something that you want to be consistent x about x so you find an accountability partner x you know like a designated person x um you know you'll say to a friend i'd x really like to do 30 minutes of my study x every day can you keep me accountable x and this is interesting because this is x i think a pretty common thing i'm sure x the majority of you have like been in x agreements like this i certainly have x um x but gretchen has some tips for this x because she says x being an accountability partner it can x be pretty tricky and it's actually a x fair amount of work x so some care should definitely be put x into that dynamic like if that's the x agreement you want to set up x and i think she's totally right about x that x um x one other thing she said that i thought x was profound is x i don't want people to dread contact x with me because i make them feel guilty x about some broken habit x and that's like a very real thing x um and so i think that's one of the x reasons that we should demonstrate that x this is actually it's not a it's not a x simple ask for someone to be that for x you x um so there's definitely like some x defining of terms and and some like x finding really the right x right balance to actually make that uh x effective and healthy i guess x and so her recommendations for this for x accountability partners uh they're x pretty interesting x she says accountability partners often x work better if they aren't particularly x close x or x if the accountability is mutual x or blast if a person is paid to hold x someone accountable x and then tied in with that like paid x professional thing she references x another author which says there's a x choice that we have when choosing x someone between a peer or a pro x and the author says prose work better x people don't take peers seriously and x peers aren't going to tell you the hard x truths you need a pro x now that x really got me thinking because that x that's really interesting to think about x in the context of a collegial life x um x like first things first i can't imagine x any context where you pay someone for x the service of accountability so that's x kind of out x um x but i think we can kind of replace pro x in this advice with uh like mentor x and i think particularly for like young x people like myself we can look to um x older brothers and sisters that we have x a relationship with that's maybe not x like the peer dynamic um x and we can look to them if we have that x kind of relationship to uh x to provide that sort of accountability x for whatever it is that uh we're trying x to do x um i can think of plenty of uh brothers x and sisters in my ecclesia that would x have no qualms about telling me the hard x truth of uh x my my failure to x to stay up to uh to par on what i'm x doing x um whereas it's harder when you're x friends x um x you know and obviously this type of x relationship and balance this isn't easy x um asking someone to keep you x accountable requires a fair amount of x vulnerability no matter what it is x even if it's as simple as doing your x readings every day i mean you are x you have to have a lot of trust to have x someone check in with you because you x may have to tell them you know i i x haven't done them the last five days x you know and that's not an easy thing x and so x finding someone who you can x have those honest conversations with uh x is is x huge and the other wrinkle that i want x to mention here regarding x gretchen's advice x uh x is again do what works for you in this x case x we all respond very differently to x accountability and x it is certainly not one size fits all x some people absolutely resent it and x it's like demoralizing and and x not a healthy thing and honestly fair x enough like figure that out for yourself x right others might prefer um like group x accountability like a readings group or x or something like that x um x another aspect to this that i thought x was really worth mentioning and honestly x probably pretty common in our community x is uh mutual accountability and i think x that's very accessible for us x you you find someone in this case it can x absolutely be you know a friend x who has a mutual goal to you x and you try and work together to build x it into your lives x and i'd argue we do that all the time as x brothers and sisters and that's a really x like special thing x uh which is cool x and so going to the bible on this x um the bible is filled with these ideas x of mutual encouragement x confession x um x i found like tons and tons of verses x about this idea x mutual encouragement confession working x together relying on one another i mean x these are some of like fundamental x biblical concepts x um so x i love like again backing up the advice x that we can get you know it's right here x in the bible for us and we can really x take a lesson from it x um x james 5 and verse 16 says x therefore confess your sins to one x another and pray for one another that x you may be healed x the prayer of a righteous person has x great power as it is working x and so there's that element of um really x being honest and vulnerable uh with with x our brothers and sisters in an effort to x ultimately um improve and x uh be better um x another very simple one you know it's we x quote it all the time but nonetheless it x had so powerful proverbs 27 17 iron x sharpens iron and one man sharpens x another x this is kind of an example of that like x mutual accountability for maybe what you x might be working on x um x part of this is x you know you have to count on x one another to be objective and and be x direct and and not to hold back and so x to actually truly be iron to each other x that that's actually a big call to us x because we both have to um show a lot of x love and also be very humble to be x refined and sharpened x as this verse calls us for x luke 17 and verse 3 it says x pay attention to yourselves x if your brother sins rebuke him and if x he repents forgive him x and x that is x it's so much easier said than done for x sure i mean to to truly rebuke someone x it has to be based in so much love and x so much care x and to really receive that instruction x which we're commanded to do x we have to we have to be humble and we x have to x um be slow to speak and try and just x listen and x you know be full of reflection in these x moments x because it is hard to be be corrected x and in the context of if you are if x you're asking for it specifically it can x be easier but particularly if uh you x don't necessarily x want the accountability or you're not x expecting the accountability that's when x it's so challenging and we really have x to be patient and um x get just humble in those moments x um x and then finally another verse that i x found that i really like in this context x is x galatians 6 and verse 2 x and it says bear one another's burdens x and so fulfill the law of christ x and that's such a positive thing and x that just speaks to to how uplifting and x helpful it is to um x be x be kind of shoulder to shoulder and arm x and arm with each other as we try and x make improvements in our lives and in x ourselves x um x you know we we really are we're x commanded it's it's not purely a x suggestion but we're commanded to seek x each other out and correct and help each x other and admonish each other x um x and work on our behavior and our actions x and you know i'd say that we're very x smart to lean on each other to help x set good habits for ourselves um you x know just like just like it says in this x book here x um so x to summarize uh the thoughts from x tonight x i know it can be really difficult to x implement the things that you want to in x your life like i i've x completely been there um x it can feel impossible at times like you x you know the good that you you want to x do you really would like to do this or x or act this way or just just add this x into your life but it's it's hard and it x never seems to work and it never seems x to stick x but it really is absolutely possible x and the answer may be in trying x different methods rather than just being x down on yourself and shaming yourself x about your lack of discipline x you know x do your best to figure out what works x for you and plays to your strengths x your goal is to make it as easy for x yourself as possible to start x automatically incorporating your habits x into your life x and this will help you stop being so x frustrated that you can't ever get x something to stick x and so as we talked about some of the x ways you can you can actually go about x this is you know identify what it is x that you'd like to do x whatever that might be in your life x and then you can use the ideas of of x monitoring of scheduling of finding some x sort of accountability x to check in as you work x um x these will help you make those changes x that have seemed elusive x and then finally just want to make the x point um x you know always always do these things x prayerfully even if they seem mundane x we're told in scripture that you know x god will will bless our efforts if we x really are trying to to put in the work x and seek him x and we can count on that x um x it may seem really hard and daunting and x we can kind of get overwhelmed by the x idea of x you know how can i actually really x always have the the energy to to do this x or to live this way um but i promise x like if if you're able to just kind of x maneuver it for yourself and and x and give it your best effort like god x will bless that x and that's everything i wanted to